Wool Is Not Stone

Texture, a study in contrasts. © JustHavingFun

Wool Is Not Stone

     This rose quartz begs a different touch: 
my thumb seeks a groove, a hollow, 
some concavity to plumb its depths despite silent
polished, gleaming, silken surface.
My tracery leaves no mark - 
     a light smudge? - or not.
Immutable, cold and solid, comforting in its way. Crystal
veins river through its depth, color shifts hint
frozen thoughts, weighty philosophy within. 
     It whispers, and I caress its secrets. 
                                                  HUSH!

     This wool beckons my hand:
Kinky and rough, 
gnarled, fuzzy, and chaotic
I long to run my fingers along the fibers
entwine my empty spaces with its strands. 
Craving to create - but what? What transcendence,
what fabric, longs to emerge from its lengths of possibility?
     So unlike marble - whose immutable form 
hides from all but the sculptor’s senses 
deep within silent, impassive mineral - 
yarn's form yields all to the creator, 
slatternly, casually, and available for any pattern, 
any configuration of loops and tangles and dreams
     Knit into fashion or fancy...
or raveled and reworked another time as the need
     or error
          or whim 
               allows...
     Cast on and bind off, and then, the magic!
Knit and crochet chains and lace, braids and cables,
ribs, entrelac, eyelet and i-cord. 
Single, half-double, double and treble,  
stockinette, picots and panels, 
     charming incantations that read like runes,
the oh-so-many improbable configurations
to tickle a topologist, perplex a puzzler, and 
mystify cats into playful kittens.
          Just a glance stirs longing 
for more and more and more - oh! feel the fiber, 
hear it talk - no, clamor - for my touch! 
                                             HUZZAH!

    

Poetry © JustHavingFun. All rights reserved.

Knitting Pride

Are you proud of your handwork?

I recently shared this essay on a Ravelry forum. I got some insights on how I tick. Pride, enjoyment, accomplishment, completion. Are these interchangeable?

Substitute your hobby, craft, or avocation with my word “knitting.” I will share later some of the responses and reactions to what I wrote. Meanwhile I just started purple baby hat #6.

* / * / * / *

Am I proud of my knitting/crocheting?

I finished a baby blanket/throw after starting it over 18 months ago just “for something to do” while waiting with Mom in the emergency room. I pieced it with some odd lots of unloved acrylic yarn left over after my sister died. I forgot about it for a while and recently completed it to get it out of the way.

Valentines Day Baby Blanket Massacre, © JustHavingFun

I suffer from chronic depression and have a hard time starting things and following through. As a sign of trying to overcome this, I showed this item and a baby hat I just started to my therapist and she loved them! As an artist she complimented the color blocking. As a non-knitter, she marveled at the stitch work. She asked, “Are you proud?”

I didn’t feel proud. I just felt null. I mean:

• I can knit–no biggie there.
• I can follow a pattern or instructions how to make a stitch.
• I can even improvise.
• It was just some oddball yarn I didn’t love.
• It wasn’t brain surgery.
• I’m not keeping the thing for myself.

I haven’t made all that many projects that are complicated. Maybe that’s the factor that stimulates a bit more excitement/pride from me. Yeah, maybe I felt a bit proud when I finished my first socks, the first stranded pattern, or when I completed the mint-green vest that is too huge. They were more complex.

Purple baby hats #1 & #2. © JustHavingFun

But overall, I’m not too impressed with myself. These little baby hats are patterned on a basic stranded pattern, but I have no excitement about the yarn or the pattern. It just zips along quickly. People who see me knitting (doctor’s waiting room, waiting to pick up a prescription, etc.) ooh and aah, but I think that’s because they have never seen anyone knit, and I’m happy to describe what I’m doing.

So I asked my community on Ravelry to see if they have pride in their handwork… all of the time? Or do they just do it sometimes “for something to do”?

Purple baby hat #5, © JustHavingFun

I tend to see the imperfections but am trying to let that go because we humans are not perfect. I haven’t started a project with my beautiful Icelandic wool because I’m not sure my skills are good enough yet. Besides, I can’t decide on a pattern.

Proud? It’s something to aspire to.

Does any of this sound familiar to you?